Before I started Roots, a wise business woman told me, “Mark, you cannot polish a turd, but you can roll it in glitter.”
A year ago, we’d proven time and again that we couldn’t do anything right. Today, we can finally boast that we can make our craft soda reliably. It’s hard to believe our boast given our history. After-all, we tried everything, and everything failed. Luckily for us, for the first time ever, persistence has been proven to pay off, and no one is more surprised than us.
But, for all our congratulatory back slapping, we have to admit that we’re not a glittered turd yet, because our marketing is still a disaster. We promised you all that we would have one million Instagram followers by the end of the year. We have seven hundred and thirty something. Clearly, we have some room for improvement. So, we have written this blog today to reassure you all that we know what we have to do, and we are on it.
Given our recent success, we have also written this blog to announce the following: we are no longer amateurs; we are semi-professionals. It is a big step forward for us, and maybe, just maybe, people will look at us one day and say, “victors”, even though, today, they look at us and say, “pie in the sky”.
Very surprisingly though, given our massive insecurities, this blog is not really about us; it is about you. It is a thank you to everyone who has championed us over the years. It is also your opportunity to tell everyone who wouldn’t listen, when you said we’d come good, that they were wrong.
Finally, until we fix our marketing, let us speak bluntly: we have plenty of soda in stock, so we would like you to go and buy it now from our online store. Delivery is 2-3 days from order, and there’s free delivery for Edinburgh residents. And, if you would like to stock our soda in Edinburgh, we would love to hear from you too – firstname.lastname@example.org.
Thank you for your time.
Your favourite semi-professional soda co.
t: +44 (0)131 552 4495
© 2020 Roots Soda Ltd.